“Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation…”. – Audre Lorde
In this statement from her 1988 book, A Burst of Light and Other Essays, Lorde recognizes the imperative of self-care for people of color. The statement feels more relevant today than ever. Though the quote is often used to support carving out “me time”, Lorde’s concept goes deeper and is a bold call to community care and transformation. (Related article: Community Care Is Essential by the Michigan Coalition to End Domestic & Sexual Violence.)
Lorde’s work to promote community care relates directly to Ubuntu, a word of Bantu origin that can be translated as “I am because we are.” In contrast to the individualistic cultural values of the U.S. and other Western nations, Ubuntu is a philosophy that reflects collectivist cultural values. At a time when people of color and those from marginalized communities may be feeling a greater sense of uncertainty and threat, it is imperative to tap into our sources of strength. The power of being in community with others is one such strength.
Finding strength in uncertain times
The Family Corner article Taking Care of Ourselves in Uncertain Times discussed the importance of self-care for parents and caregivers as a foundation for taking care of our young people. A second article in that series, Taking Care of Your Young People in Uncertain Times, shared tips for engaging young people and finding places of stability and security in the midst of societal turmoil.
These articles highlighted empowerment as the antidote to helplessness and hopelessness. To be empowered means to recognize that you can take action in productive ways. Research on the mental health of young people of color has identified cultural pride as a source of empowerment and a buffer against the impacts of racism and discrimination on mental health and academic achievement.
What “rollback” means?
There has been a lot of talk about a “rollback” of diversity and inclusion efforts. As parents and caregivers, it is critical that we do a “rollback” of our own. We must roll back false notions of the superiority of one group over another based on color, race, creed, immigration status, gender, gender identity, sexual orientation, ethnicity, or socioeconomic status.
This rollback of false notions has to be direct, intentional, and continuous. When young people of color are grounded and strongly rooted in a sense of who they are and where they come from, it serves as a key protective factor for their mental health and well-being. We may not be able to prevent our young people from unfortunate encounters with racism and discrimination, but as parents and caregivers we can build their understanding of the richness of their heritage and the unlimited potential they possess.
Three Steps to Get Started
- Spot. Stop. Debunk. If you hear your young person say something that reflects an internalized stereotype, stop them on the spot and debunk it.
- Supplement the learning. If your young person attends a school that no longer teaches an accurate history of people of color, women, immigrants, or those from other marginalized groups, make a plan to supplement their education yourself.
- Form a community group to bring students together on weekends.
- Find speakers or community leaders willing to provide a learning session at a local community center or house of worship.
- Organize a trip to historical landmarks, museums and other places of significance to the history of people of color in the US.
- Come up with a documentary and movie playlist highlighting key historical figures and events and watch together.
- Join or create a book club.
- Become the change. Encourage your young person to engage in thinking about how they plan to “be the change” they want to see in the world. Small steps can lead to big change, and with the right support and information, young people can change the world.
Simply put, teaching and celebrating cultural heritage is not just nice to do. It is smart, it is strategic, and, in these times, it is absolutely necessary
